How a Flexible Mindset Helps Us Respond to Challenges in Healthy Ways

Taking a pause, and asking ourselves questions allows us to take time to look at the big picture: Is there another way to look at this? How am I interpreting the situation? Should I get someone else’s perspective?

As a child, I was never very flexible; touching my toes seemed almost impossible. I envied my friends, who could naturally bend in all sorts of configurations. However, I learned with some regular stretches; I could loosen up and touch my toes. Now, as I have aged, I realize the importance of remaining flexible; it stretches the muscles and keeps them from becoming stiff.

Developing a flexible mindset, in such ever-changing times requires a similar approach, regularly exercising new ways to adapt to stressful events and unplanned circumstances. When we have a fixed mindset, we might believe we don’t have the ability or the skills to deal with the problem.

When this happens, we often lose the ability to look at the big picture and respond in a logical or creative way. To help us develop a flexible mindset that responds, as opposed to a fixed mindset that reacts, we first need to hit the pause button. 

Taking a pause is crucial for parents. A flexible mindset can make a difference in how we respond to the ever-changing challenges we face in raising our children. For example, if your child is starting to struggle in school, or perhaps begins to argue with limits set, taking a pause to think through what may be motivating the problem or behavior can give you a better perspective on how to respond. Are they struggling with frustration or fear? Do they understand what is expected of them? Are they getting enough sleep?

Hitting the pause button gives us time to figure out how to handle our emotions and mentally prepare how to handle each circumstance. Just as stretching and pausing take time for the muscles to respond, so will learning to actually hit the pause button and find flexible ways to respond to stressful, difficult, and ever-changing situations.

— Laura Super, Life Coach