Empathy

Those of us who have a strong empathic gift tend to instinctively want to “show” the other we deeply understand their feelings and they are not alone. I never share a story because I am trying to hijack the conversation - it is almost always because I am trying to connect with the other person and demonstrate empathy. But this behavior can sometimes get misconstrued as one trying to “make it about you” (and don’t get me wrong, some individuals do hijack conversations and make it about them).

That being said, there is a time and place to share your own stories and sometimes it is more appropriate to sit back and just listen. Alternatively, if you tend to do this, you may want to ask for consent first, i.e., “Do you mind if I share a similar experience, or do you need more time to vent? I want you to be able to express whatever you need to today”. Anyway, a reminder to try to give people the benefit of the doubt. Most helper types are just trying to connect to your experience and help you feel supported when they share relevant personal stories.

— Shannan Cason, Psy.D.